>Talk to the doors.
YOU:
Fine, doors. I guess I'm talking to doors now.
Fine, doors. I guess I'm talking to doors now.
DOUBLE DOORS:
Trust me, this is just as ridiculous on my end.
Trust me, this is just as ridiculous on my end.
YOU:
[sigh]...I won't ask why. What did you want to tell me?
[sigh]...I won't ask why. What did you want to tell me?
DOUBLE DOORS:
Well, you'll certainly find a few things of interest through Marvin there, though he's not particularly talkative. I've even seen a thing like you come in and out of him, though to be frank, nobody around here opens up into anything as important as A MAGNIFICENT FOOD DREAM OF 1,000,000 NUTRITION!!!
Well, you'll certainly find a few things of interest through Marvin there, though he's not particularly talkative. I've even seen a thing like you come in and out of him, though to be frank, nobody around here opens up into anything as important as A MAGNIFICENT FOOD DREAM OF 1,000,000 NUTRITION!!!
YOU:
......What??
......What??
DOUBLE DOORS:
Oh...sorry...little hiccup there. I think. Something like that. Yeah.
Oh...sorry...little hiccup there. I think. Something like that. Yeah.
YOU:
Kay...so...I have to ask...do you know what's outside this "hospital?"
Kay...so...I have to ask...do you know what's outside this "hospital?"
DOUBLE DOORS:
Haha. Weird. Nothing's "outside" anything, champ. Is your liver broken or something?
Haha. Weird. Nothing's "outside" anything, champ. Is your liver broken or something?
YOU:
Wait...liver?
Wait...liver?
DOUBLE DOORS:
Phage said that was your thinking part, isn't it?
Phage said that was your thinking part, isn't it?
YOU:
...Great, of course he did.
So uh, you know anything about the password to that big, rusty metal door down the exam hall?
...Great, of course he did.
So uh, you know anything about the password to that big, rusty metal door down the exam hall?
DOUBLE DOORS:
Oh man, what a jerk. What a complete and utter jerk, that guy. Sorry, you won't get anything out of him. Phage is the only one who knows the code. You can try asking nicely, but he'll just have you transfusionated.
Oh man, what a jerk. What a complete and utter jerk, that guy. Sorry, you won't get anything out of him. Phage is the only one who knows the code. You can try asking nicely, but he'll just have you transfusionated.
YOU:
What exactly is "transfusionating?"
What exactly is "transfusionating?"
DOUBLE DOORS:
Haha. Wouldn't you like to know.
Haha. Wouldn't you like to know.
YOU:
....What did you say you were the doors to, again?
....What did you say you were the doors to, again?
DOUBLE DOORS:
Huh? I didn't say. What are youuULTIMATE FEAST MATTER SINGS A SECRET MEAL TIME WISHabbling on about?
Huh? I didn't say. What are youuULTIMATE FEAST MATTER SINGS A SECRET MEAL TIME WISHabbling on about?
YOU:
....Huh?.....
....Huh?.....
DOUBLE DOORS:
What?
What?
YOU:
What was that just now?
What was that just now?
DOUBLE DOORS:
ONE MILLION EAT TIMES. INFINITY FLESH TASTES. FOODENENGE FOREVER AND NEVER ENDED!!!
ONE MILLION EAT TIMES. INFINITY FLESH TASTES. FOODENENGE FOREVER AND NEVER ENDED!!!
YOU:
.....Door?
.....Door?
DOUBLE DOORS:
FLESH MEAT FOOD MEAL TASTE FLESH PART MADE FROM MOST REAL MATTERS!!!
FLESH MEAT FOOD MEAL TASTE FLESH PART MADE FROM MOST REAL MATTERS!!!
YOU:
....W...what?
...Door guy?
.....
....W...what?
...Door guy?
.....
The doors fall dead silent. You suddenly realize you've been speaking out loud, but only hearing the thing's voice in your head. Out the corner of your eye, you catch Zoe hastily returning to her book, as though having gawked at the entire exchange.
At least it's kind of hard to feel like a weirdo around here.
At least it's kind of hard to feel like a weirdo around here.