's 2013 Horror Write-off:

"Not my Children"

Submitted by Nick Mandrak

There are parasites in my house. They're not my kids. They did something to my brain. I have to feed them and I have to bathe them.

They're not my children, but I can’t hurt them. I have to take care of them.


I look at them and see just cute. They look so cute. But when I turn around and look at them from the side, I can see that they don't have eyes. They have these dark spots that are just so cute, but they are not eyes. They have no eyes. All I do is feed them and wash them. They came out of me.


They let me have the phone to order pizza. They eat that. I wash them afterwards. They’re in my head. I can’t even do anything else. They came out of me, but they left something in my brain. I just can’t stop. They’re not my children.


I was injected me with the parasites and they grew inside me and now they’re in my house. I think they’re my children. I have to protect them. I have to feed them. When they cry, I can’t even think straight. They’re sleeping now, but they’re not my children. I can’t hurt them, but I want to.



Ma’am, please can you hear me? Hello? You’re experiencing a nervous breakdown. You might have postpartum depression. But Ms., you cannot hurt your children. You have to tell me your address. I will send over help. We will help you and your children. Stay where you are. Do not hurt yourself or your children. Ms, can you please give me your address?

How did I birth children? I'm a man.