"This is Why We Fart"

I was well into my teens when I first started to suspect that I might be the only one.

I discovered the truth when one of my neighbours was taken. I saw it happen. I still wonder if I could have done something. But... I wasn't prepared. This happens all the time, and normally, everything turns out alright, so how was I supposed to know...?

See, there are these tall guys. Sneaky things, with long, spindly limbs and long faces, big teeth and globular eyes protruding from their heads. They are everywhere, hiding in the shadows, in holes and crevices, all folded up, waiting for the right target, the right moment to strike.

Then, once they have set their eyes on a particular person, they will sneak up on them, preferably from behind, on their tippy toes. Slowly, slowly, always making a face like they are trying to suppress a laughing fit. Slowly unfolding their limbs, spreading their fingers. Shivering in anticipation.

And then, at the very last moment, just when they are about to strike, the person they targeted will fart. The creature will dissolve into a cloud of dust, gurgling in agony, with an expression of absolute disgust and terror on its twisted face. The person, meanwhile, rarely even looks up from what they were doing before. If there are other people present, they might say "excuse me", or make jokes about the fart itself. But nobody aknowledges the monster. If there is no predator around, most people will just hold their farts in. I have always been able to time it perfectly.

But there will always be mistakes. When I was a teenager, I saw one of our neighbours chatting with someone at a barbecue, and there was one of the creatures sneaking up on them, emerging from behind a nearby tree. I didn't bother to warn them - unspoken rule of silence, remember - but I saw their expression, just before the creature's claws closed around their shoulders.

They were making a face like they were trying to hold back a fart.

This was the first time I actually saw one of the creatures succeed. It happened really fast. The very second it had achieved contact, an expression of incredulous euphoria appeared on its monstrous face, and the two of them dissipated, never to be seen again. Though I'll never forget the eyes of the person who was taken.

I was screaming. Screaming that person's name, crying for help.

Everyone assumed I was having a mental breakdown. It wasn't long before I understood that no one remembered the victim at all. Not only that, but all physical traces of the victim's existence had been altered or erased as well - their home, their car, everything. Even their children.

No one believed me, and no one else could see the predators.