's 2016 Horror Write-off:

Greg's Diary

Submitted by James B. Davis


My teeth hurt today. I can feel the copper scraping against my mullers and it's making my gums bleed. I hate the way the blood tastes: chemically and acidic, like licking a battery. I should really brush my teeth more

David told me I should just try not to think about it. It's not easy but it works. I really hate when David's right. He's such a know-it-all and I hate it. I just wish he wasn't my brother so I could hate him for it. But if he wasn't around I'd be pretty lonely, so I'm glad he's around I guess.


I fell in the mud today and cried. Jessica laughed at me and made me feel even worse. I know she didn't mean to make me feel bad, and I forgive her, but it really hurt. I love Jessica. She doesn't even know...

I had to pick the dried dirt out of my joints when it dried... it was terrible. I hate when things get into my joints. It feels terrible and it's just so uncomfortable.

I wish I could just clean it out with water.


Me and Jessica went for a walk today. We had a great time.

I really want to tell her how I feel... But I'm afraid of what she'll say. What if leaves?


Me and Jessica kissed today and I shocked her lips. She said it hurt, but she wasn't mad at me. I told her how I felt and she said she felt the same. I've never been this happy.


My hermit crabs had babies today on New Year's Day. It was pretty cool. I named them Squirrel, Gerdy, Bartholomew, Strix, and PCP. PCP's shell is strange; it's not coiled and spirally like the others.

Jessica saw my gears today and screamed. I told her she wouldn't understand. She didn't care though, she was just surprised. I still love her. She still loves me. I've never felt this real before now...