's 2017 Horror Write-off:

Age doesn’t kill cars do

Submitted by Brian Shadensack

Listen all I want to do is have nightmares again

To wake up in a cold sweat

Especially if I am already awake

One moment is all it takes to die

To awaken to the fundamental reality

The kabbalistic reality that’s hidden

In every single book that no one’s ever bothered to read

Two can become one can become three

Can become any number you can think of

And maybe even the numbers everyone’s forgot

Or are two afraid to remember

Three twins half of them decide not to exist

You're left with three people

Maybe twins are half formed

Two bodies souls like gummies

Melting in the sun in the glory of the avatar

Four horsemen of the apocalypse

They used to be War Death Famine Conquest

People always say Pestilence

But that’s a later interpretation of it

As long as we're changing scripture

Lets add Pollution and Apathy

To give us five horseman of the apocalypse

Is my math wrong

Is your math wrong

Is math wrong

Six six six six sex sex sex

Some mantric ritual

To summon the devil

For the great proletariat  death orgy

Or whatever you call it when they fuck us

Physically, spiritually, socially, morally there's no way anyone’s surviving

Seven sins seven virtues

I can imagine sloth being a virtue sometime

In the bible there just describing depression

Evagrius the Solitary comes up with the seven

No, eight evil thoughts one has to overcome in 375 AD.

And his pupil, which makes him not so solitary, John Cassian

Writes "The Institutes"

Before all that nasty Heresy business

Which Pope Gregory the First

Pope Gregory the Great refines into the Seven Deadly sins

And changes Catholic Dogma forever

The eighth sin is honestly liking cherry mashes

Foul pink orbs

Candy afterbirth rolled in crushed nuts

And something that we call chocolate

Which be glad that we really don’t know what chocolate is

Its mind melting

Let skip some number

Nine ten eleven twelve are just numbers

That we remember

And aren't afraid of

Until we found out what they did to the bodies
Of our great great great  grandparents

I guess thirteen is supposed to be unlucky or evil

Which is why some buildings don’t have thirteenth floors

If you ever find yourself on a thirteenth floor that shouldn't exist

Run, or don’t, it's kind of a moot point

You're not dead or alive or breathing or rotting

On this non existent thirteenth floor

That we all are stuck on

Fourteen wants to think it's important

Wake up one days and you forget the word for the color blue

But you finally able to describe it to a blind man

And suddenly there’s doors everywhere

With things and stuff and stuff and things behind it

All this work is so very exhausting you tell yourself

Or you hope it's you telling yourself

It's oh so crowded in the head

Your head

My head

Our head

The one your parents bought for you

After the accident

I forgot what comes after fourteen

Which is the real horror

At Sixteen you can drive

Sacrifice your gristle to the Mayan crossroads

Cover the nerve axon of the world in your fat

After the crash that happens to everyone

Fat is important blood isn’t

I, you, me, us, we, them, xim, shem, him, her would exsanguinate themselves for a good burger

Vegetarianism, like the existence of hands is a lie

Seventeen is the most randomly appearing number in random number sets

The pentagon isn’t shaped as it appears

Because the white void isn’t shaped like the way it appears

Because Age doesn’t kill Cars do