Bogleech.com's 2019 Horror Write-off:
Do Not Honk
Submitted by OpenAI
Do not honk.
If you see a deer, do not run, turn, or otherwise try to evade or fight off the deer.
Do not stand in any place where deer may be present, such as near or in brush, thickets, or woodlands.
Do not leave food or garbage unattended, even for a short period of time.
Do not take any chances when it comes to your safety. When it comes to your safety, the only real option is to stay where you are.
Do not attempt to scare deer. They are highly likely to move off when they realize you are a human. If you do attempt to scare the deer away from your vehicle, it is highly likely to scare the deer off before you can get your vehicle in motion.
Use of a long stick to scare off the deer can cause damage to the deer. The deer will not stop running until it runs over the stick, or is run over. It is much safer to use a long stick that is about the size of a football to drive your vehicle, or you could use a machete to scare the deer off of your vehicle.
You must make sure you are driving safely. Never drive faster than the speed limit, and never drive with your vehicle stopped in the middle of the road, because deer will not hesitate to jump out of the road, if they think you are there to harm them. You are on your own in this regard.
Keep your vehicle doors and windows closed, so the deer will not see you.
If you see a deer crossing the road, you must immediately stop your vehicle, and get out to prevent any injury or damage to your car.
If you see a deer crossing the road, you must immediately stop your vehicle, and get out to prevent any injury or damage to your car. If you see a deer, you must immediately stop your vehicle, and get out to prevent any injury or damage to your car.
If you see a deer crossing the road, you must immediately stop your vehicle, and get out to prevent any injury or damage to your car.
A deer can't make a right turn on red.
A deer can't make a left turn on red.
A deer can't cross a road unless you are behind them and they've reached the right-hand side of the road.
A deer can't cross a road unless they are on the road.
A deer can't cross a road in the middle of the road.
A deer can't ride on a sidewalk.
A deer can't run through a red light.
A deer can't pass you on the shoulder.
A deer can't pass you on the left if you are driving on a four-lane road.
A deer can't pass you on the right if you are driving on a two-lane road.
A deer can't pass you on the wrong side of the road if you are driving on a two-lane road.
A deer can't overtake you.
A deer can't pass you on the other side of a three-way intersection.
A deer can't pass you at the entrance to a city or town if you're driving at a high speed.
A deer can't pass you on a mountain highway.
A deer can't pass you while driving a snowmobile.
In fact, I'd argue that a deer can't pass you in most situations, especially while you're driving at a high speed or on a mountain highway.
You can tell a deer is driving very fast or doing anything dangerous simply by looking for one, as they'll be moving in a straight line while trying to get past you.
It doesn't have to be a deer to drive you mad - dogs and cats are known to be quite capable of breaking the back of your car with their claws, and they are almost never to be trusted.
What you should do:
Don't get into a fight with a deer unless you're prepared to risk serious injury, and even then the best way to defend yourself is to take your car in for servicing.
Don't drive into a car with your hazard lights on - just turn the hazard lights off, and don't panic.
If the deer is really on your tail, turn off your hazard lights and turn your hazard lights back on.
If you encounter any trouble, dial 911 and then get help.
It is a good idea to have a second person on the phone.
If you are unable to see the deer, you should use your horn.
If you see a deer, do not run, turn, or otherwise try to evade or fight off the deer.
Do not stand in any place where deer may be present, such as near or in brush, thickets, or woodlands.
Do not leave food or garbage unattended, even for a short period of time.
Do not take any chances when it comes to your safety. When it comes to your safety, the only real option is to stay where you are.
Do not attempt to scare deer. They are highly likely to move off when they realize you are a human. If you do attempt to scare the deer away from your vehicle, it is highly likely to scare the deer off before you can get your vehicle in motion.
Use of a long stick to scare off the deer can cause damage to the deer. The deer will not stop running until it runs over the stick, or is run over. It is much safer to use a long stick that is about the size of a football to drive your vehicle, or you could use a machete to scare the deer off of your vehicle.
You must make sure you are driving safely. Never drive faster than the speed limit, and never drive with your vehicle stopped in the middle of the road, because deer will not hesitate to jump out of the road, if they think you are there to harm them. You are on your own in this regard.
Keep your vehicle doors and windows closed, so the deer will not see you.
If you see a deer crossing the road, you must immediately stop your vehicle, and get out to prevent any injury or damage to your car.
If you see a deer crossing the road, you must immediately stop your vehicle, and get out to prevent any injury or damage to your car. If you see a deer, you must immediately stop your vehicle, and get out to prevent any injury or damage to your car.
If you see a deer crossing the road, you must immediately stop your vehicle, and get out to prevent any injury or damage to your car.
A deer can't make a right turn on red.
A deer can't make a left turn on red.
A deer can't cross a road unless you are behind them and they've reached the right-hand side of the road.
A deer can't cross a road unless they are on the road.
A deer can't cross a road in the middle of the road.
A deer can't ride on a sidewalk.
A deer can't run through a red light.
A deer can't pass you on the shoulder.
A deer can't pass you on the left if you are driving on a four-lane road.
A deer can't pass you on the right if you are driving on a two-lane road.
A deer can't pass you on the wrong side of the road if you are driving on a two-lane road.
A deer can't overtake you.
A deer can't pass you on the other side of a three-way intersection.
A deer can't pass you at the entrance to a city or town if you're driving at a high speed.
A deer can't pass you on a mountain highway.
A deer can't pass you while driving a snowmobile.
In fact, I'd argue that a deer can't pass you in most situations, especially while you're driving at a high speed or on a mountain highway.
You can tell a deer is driving very fast or doing anything dangerous simply by looking for one, as they'll be moving in a straight line while trying to get past you.
It doesn't have to be a deer to drive you mad - dogs and cats are known to be quite capable of breaking the back of your car with their claws, and they are almost never to be trusted.
What you should do:
Don't get into a fight with a deer unless you're prepared to risk serious injury, and even then the best way to defend yourself is to take your car in for servicing.
Don't drive into a car with your hazard lights on - just turn the hazard lights off, and don't panic.
If the deer is really on your tail, turn off your hazard lights and turn your hazard lights back on.
If you encounter any trouble, dial 911 and then get help.
It is a good idea to have a second person on the phone.
If you are unable to see the deer, you should use your horn.