Bogleech.com's 2020 Horror Write-off:

Untraced Transmissions Received By Extradermal Broadband Reception Station 3, Voya Extraspace Pocket

Submitted by The Ungreat Nol-Zzyzyx

Transmission 1:
(beginning of signal) {So}, the unspoken rule is, don’t eat the dundi’s nest. You can do business, you can *static*, you’ll be fine.
…/…/.\.../\...\\/…//…/……/./…/..
So, what are more of these statements?
/…\///\\\\\../.\../……\...’.
And how does that… mixed message go over?
**/\**//***/*\\*\/****////\***/
#($)()@_#*&%~*$)E($**@($)$*%**%)_!(#U)#__~(#*#*$)@)@)!+)@
This is an absolute public relations nightmare, no questions here, both sides agree.
**)@((@_$I*%^&$(#(#((%u^(@)*$(@)@t%*$(@)_*$
And what are these commissions? So, now people think that the ZFLB is pandering, kowtowing to the authoritarian Vloohemm, and meanwhile *static* that {the} Hypernation is… {basically} *static* the third (signal cuts)

Transmission 2:
40:03:10. We are back online for our seventh quad-undulation.
*static*
Looks like we have a kinda maybe partial trade deal with the Seething?
So, what is in this?
What is in this? Everything.
*unrecognizable chittering*
The stress on the area means that this, now, will remain. However, this deal doesn’t actually really deal with anything that the 302 infestation into the Seething’s misuse of conceptual channel rights *static* uncovered.
*static*
Clearly, folks were divided about that last rate cut. What does our anonymous correspondent have to say about *static*?
We’re trying to do a mid-cycle adjustment, we’re {trying to?} *static*
*static*
Most consumers seem to think that the economy is doing just fine right now. *static* First, *static*
././..\..\.\././///\/\\....//../..*static*
And so the industry is taking extra precautions *static* if confirmed, this *static*
I feel extremely concerning from the regions of *static*
I’m shimmering in the lichen *indistinct word* *static*
Transmission 3:
Thirty-seven foldings ago, requiring an employee to settle disputes *indistinct* was *static*
And some constructs are sinking their hooks {in} *static*
We strive against *static*

Transmission 4:
Live from *static*, and this is (loud, feedback-like screeching) *static* is closing in on the Upper Seething *static* part of the chain is believed to be related to the Spluttering Choir *static* back-to-back record-breaking cases of slobbification *static* known Parliament activity in the area. *static* a fitting place to start. *static* once denied an existence pass due to certain *static*. One final passage over the iconic Whuppelling Plunge *static*. The latest horrors from the *static* scene have begun to considerably escalate in pitch, as over gwelpty-blordryan glopterms begin to invert the second spiral overture *static*. Towards new trade relations with the exocoronal onslaughts. This program was brought to you by *two minutes of various beeps, pops and buzzing sounds with intermittent static drowning out all audio.* Meanwhile, the wasting of gel and existomatter in these parazones can continue unabated, as the Proteose Sectate win themselves yet another set of conceptual ventoducts in the *static* grey zone acquisitions *static* unprecedented horrors to be inflicted upon this vulnerable region of *static*. The undular flapping zones are annexed by their proxy concepts, obviously seen *static* lapse in clarity. Peraplastic artifice produced by the cladological communities of the Purplefifth Angle Zone’s inclined *static*. *signal lost*

Transmission 5:
The stars are with us on this fine Flempterwabe shump pit, mavrens and mauvlorms. Zonal chatter is at an all-time low, and by the by we’re great at it - just glistening out of the fresh paramaterial style, and we’ve got a show for you, things. *static* now is the only place that matters, *indistinct, possibly ‘friends and foes’* alike. We’ve got it all. We’ve got it all. Duck storytime. Even the slong swamps can tell you something interesting through the ciliary ducts *static*. The squelch you do to your friends and neighbors, am I right, Quangloth?
Pwaaah blue blue kwempt thogging like the only one it was, Mr. Macro Thing! *static* and what a fine fine time we’ve gotten from the third undulator up through *static* and all the way down. *static*. We’ll have a JOLLY GOOD TIME. *static* first of all, I know a lot of you don’t have “bodies” or whatever you call them, but shit fuck fuck the cunt fuck shit have a fucking! No thing can be as goooood on your tomble wips from the shlerp to the nards!~ klark. Klark.