" A Minor Obsession "

A minor obsession.



I have a minor problem. A tiny little thing that occupies my mind. Normally it’s just fine, normally I’m PERFECTLY FINE. Oh sorry about that, didn’t mean to shout, anyway where was I… ah yes my ‘minor obsession’. It’s really nothing major, sometimes there’s just something you find repulsive, something that disgusts you, something that DRIVES You out of your Fucking MIND! Not fear, not a phobia, just something that’s repulses you. Don’t you have something, you do don’t you, yes, yes, Yes I knew it!



Ah for me it’s something that people… have I guess? Not sure about the word… Eh ANYWAY its part of the human body, something relatively minor at that. Yet it irritates me, it grates at me, I can’t STAND it. What is it? Oh shush shush, I’m getting there and I don’t think you are in any position to rush me, ARE YOU.



Ah, I went off topic didn’t I. I’m rather sorry about that, I get distracted far too easy, I really shouldn’t do that, and I’m not nearly as neat during the procedure when I do get distracted. Ah yes the procedure, that will come REAL soon. Ah and I still haven’t told you what that irritating, infuriating, vexatious… object? Oh who CARES about the word it’s the knee!



Oh laughing are you? Eh I supposed it is rather odd, my minor obsession they called, a little vexation. Either way it leaves an acrid taste in my mouth. Frankly I couldn’t tell you why, the shape maybe? The twisting, warping movement, like the unfolding of a strange geometric shape, protruding like a grotesque twist of the bone inside it. It irks me, it twists at me, it claws at me deep inside. It’s not RIGHT, It just not RIGHT!



Oh I suppose it’s time to get to the procedure. I suppose no need to beat around the bush, I’m going to remove it, both of the ones you have, hmm I’d try not to move too much, I apologise but anesthetic is just not easy to happen across it and the last time I had any I got just a little a bit too careless and cut a slit much too large. They bled out when I was cleaning my tools. So I usually don’t bother looking anymore.



Ah, ah AHhhhhh, be quiet and try not to move or I won’t bother stitching you closed afterwards, ah much better. I thank you for that. It’s not like I like doing this, I have been trying to get better at it, and to stop killing them, but it’s not easy. Working with sub-quality tools, in an abandoned shack in the woods. But it’s necessary, of course it’s necessary. So I can remove these blights, these twisted pathetic masses of flesh.



There we go! All stitched up, just let me clean up my tools and I’ll go drop you outside town. Hmm? What do you mean, ‘why haven’t I removed mine if it bothers me so much’, Ah ohh did you REALLY HAVE to say that? I REALLY, REALLY didn’t need a reminder that I still have that hideous abomination inside my body, but sadly without it it’s much too difficult to catch people without them. Once I’m done I’ll finally remove them. I will finally be FREE! Ah, sorry again everything’s ready even if you can’t see it



And there we go, time to drop you off sorry for the long drive but this place is way out of the way. The people know what it’s like. They now the minor obsession, you’ll fit Right in with them, you see they simply couldn’t restrain themselves from removing their little vexation from themselves. Though I don’t blame they simply couldn’t restrain themselves for removing THE STAINS OF WRONGNESS FROM THEIR VERY EXISTENCE.



Ah, sorry about that, guess I’ll have to replace that window. Oh well, I better head off, huh oh don’t worry someone coming to pick you up, they will let you free. Oh well, thank you by the way you were a most agreeable patient, some of the others were much more difficult, easy to make mistakes when they’re disagreeable isn’t it? Oh well that doesn’t mean anything to you anymore, it’s unlikely you’ll see me again. Oh ‘call the police’ eh I’m not worried, the people around here won’t let you, and heh I can tell you right now it won't help, at all. See ya, Have a nice life! You will I know, now that your Free.