" Butterball "

It's truly terrible. Just imagine it. You open up the freezer to get a Popsicle and tomorrow is Thanksgiving. You've just bought a massive Butterball Turkey for the family to eat. You close the freezer, and suddenly, you hear something from inside of it. You carefully open up the freezer, only to see your new, Butterball Turkey sitting, eating frozen hamburger meat. It leaps down from the freezer and crawls away into the dark living room before you.



You only step one foot into your living room before you slip on the smiley trail left by the Turkey's plucked, half frozen body. As you lay on the ground, you hear the rapid sound of moist legs slapping the floor. It jumps on you and tries to engulf your entire head. Your head is sucked into it's empty, headless body. Every time you pull, it grabs on tighter.



Finally, you stop, and you give in. Your face is pressed against the thawing hamburger meat left in it's stomach and you vomit. Your head is now drowning in a soup of hamburger meat and puke. You now accept your fate, and you pass away from your mortal shell.