Bogleech Halloween Classics:


DISCOVERED: Wal-Mart Claw Machine, 2009

Jonathan Wojcik

   At least once a year, I find something reasonably interesting from a claw machine, also known as a "crane" machine or, in the most sophisticated circles, "U.F.O. Catcher." Admittedly, I often have to sink an unreasonable amount of money into one of the bastards, but the rewards are well worth it. Rewards like...this. Whatever this is. A witch? Somebody seems to have forgotten to give her a hat. Or, uh, a mouth.

   Objectively speaking, any normal person might consider this one of the worst possible Halloween plush toys ever conceived, but its nondescript, simplistic crumminess only makes it more and more charming. As charming as it is creepy. Really, imagine this same goofy, mouthless face outside your bedroom window in the moonlight, and tell me you don't feel at least a subtle shudder coming on.

I ultimately settled on "GOB" for this thing's name. It was the very, very last item I found during Halloween 2009, and felt like a nice little bookend to the year's haunts.