Written by Jonathan Wojcik

$13 At The Dollar Tree 2019!

You didn't think I'd forgotten this tradition, did you?!


Since 2017, Dollar Tree has been selling small, plastic witches and ghosts that emit generic cackling or wailing sounds, and those are back once more this year as well...but they've been joined by friendlier-looking cousins who loudly sing "TRICK OR TREAT! SMELL MY FEET!" when their motion sensor is triggered. At least, that's what the ghost does, which is the one I picked up. How hilariously obnoxious is this product though, seriously? Loud, motion activated, cheap as hell, and small. You could afford dozens of them and hide them all over the home if you really wanted to give someone a miserable enough time.


Light up eyeball headbands are nothing new, but this is the first one I've ever seen with four eyeballs, giving the wearer six in total! I feel like this would be a really fun addition to a spider-themed costume. Not a more literal, more realistic spider, but the more "symbolic" kind of spider costume, like when it's maybe a couple of spidery legs and a spider-themed dress. Just slap some extra eyes on there! Glowing ones!


This is actually a cheap recycling of Dollar Tree's wind-up hopping Easter bunnies, but now they're dressed as ghosts, or something.


A true Hocus is typically a witch's hat with legs, but I'm increasingly seeing decorations that consist solely of a witchy skirt with legs. A witch with no body above the waist. I think these qualify just as much as Hocuses, and I really like the overall design of these two paper specimens...even if their actual, physical quality leaves something to be desired. I like purple's inwardly-pointed toes, as if she's kinda freaking out about something. Maybe about where she misplaced the mannequin body she puts on so she can go grocery shopping.

These are of course a dollar each, so this is another $2 down!


This is just a bag of tiny paddleballs with various Halloween designs on them, but the one of note is this one with nondescript monsters all over it. The kind of nondescript monsters I declared Bugbears some time ago, but the central one here has the added bonus of resembling a five-eyed anglerfish with tentacles, one of its eyeballs also serving as its illicium!


I love things with big solar powered headlight eyes, and when Dollar Tree originally debuted its skull and cat head offerings, I actually wished there had also been a little sheet ghost. 2019 has delivered just that, and these freaky, bug-eyed little phantoms couldn't be more perfect, even if mine stopped working after about a day or two.


Did I already review these once? I think I might have, but I'm not sure if I demonstrated how bright they are. These two are illuminating a planter full of venus fly traps, and I like the idea that they "belong" to it, that this planter full of venus fly traps happens to also have a pair of big bioluminescent eyeballs that hover over it.

...And also stopped working after a couple days. At least they still look okay during the day!


I'm cheating here, because as you can see, these peanut butter pumpkins do not cost an entire dollar. I did, however, buy the last one that was in this particular box, which is what I really wanted. I already had a whole bag of these things at home, but now I get to own a lovely little cardboard tray with those excellent Arachnocups all over it.


My final three bucks went into nabbing 2019's full set of coffin treat boxes, a tradition Dollar Tree shows no sign of stopping. This year's mummy (there's almost always a mummy!) has a surprisingly cute, but still quite eerie face, the skeleton is autumn themed with a candy pail and a couple of rat friends, and the vampire is hilariously recoiling from the light you presumably expose him to when you open the lid! GENIUS!

I'm also happy to say that having reviewed these for years now, I actually got a very nice email from the artist, because oh yeah, it's always been the same artist, Mary Jo Hull, whose personal webpage is at maryjohull.com!

She even showed me these clear, crisp images of the new art, as well as a skeleton bride design that got rejected for presumably being a little too grim!